Assigning Tasks To Attendants
When you are getting married, you want all your loved ones around you. However, choose your attendants with care. If you have a large family and many friends, you will probably know how to be tactful, so that nobody is offended.
It goes without saying that you must first ask your close family members to attend to your needs because they know you well and you have no secrets from them. If choosing friends, choose the ones you are most comfortable with. You will have to explain to the ones you don’t choose that you cannot possibly have all of them at the altar with you. If you had been the bridesmaid or best man for a particular cousin or friend, it is not mandatory that they must be yours too. Feel free to choose anyone you wish and there is no need to go by formality or protocol. Be practical and clearly express what kind of help you will require. Do you just need somebody by your side on the big day or would you require help with the invitation or bridal clothes. Remember that a very busy friend or someone who lives in another city may not be able to help much.
There may be someone who decides to play the role of bridal attendant without being asked to do so. There will be polite brides who will allow this and there will be firm ones who will not compromise and allow just anyone to be attendant. It is best to leave the decision to the bride and groom.
How many attendants you need depends on your budget and the number of guests expected. Attendants usually bear the cost of their own clothes and traveling expenses if any. But it is courteous to give a gift to the attendants as a token of appreciation. It would be appropriate to have 2 bridesmaids and 2 groomsmen for every 100 guests. But you can relax the rules to suit you. You can keep the wedding as small and intimate as you wish with few attendants or you can have 12 attendants and a lavish wedding. Usually there are 2 to 6 attendants and also a flower girl and a ring bearer. The attendants can be of either sex for the bride or groom. Don’t worry if you have 3 bridesmaids and 4 groomsmen, the number can vary.
You can delegate one of these tasks to each attendant or one may perform more than one of them. Ask one of the attendants to stand at the entrance to welcome the guests. Another can handle the guest book and gift table. There are other tasks such as program distribution, candle lighting, favor distribution, rice or confetti distribution. The eloquent one can read out the poem. The ones with a flair for singing or the piano are always wanted at every wedding. Little girls are always delighted to play junior bridesmaid. Do not forget older members of the family. Honor them with a flower or salutation.
When you are selecting attendants remember that less is more. It is easier to co-ordinate with few attendants.